Foods to stock up on (and not stock up on) in the event of an Apocalypse

You’ll want to prevent any extra diseases so a well balanced diet is an important part of surviving The Apocalypse.  Running to the corner store or Wal-Mart won’t be an option. Here’s what to stock up on:

                -Canned Beans (for protein)

                -Jerky (because everyone has jerky in the good adventure stories)

    -Stale bread (Really stale, like make sure you could kill something with it if you had to, because      you might)

                -Freeze dried citrus fruits (to prevent scurvy)

                -*Unlabeled cans of food (Just to keep things interesting)

-Water (Clean water. Eventually you may have to drink your own urine due to the poisonous nature of the water, but it’s best to put that off as long as possible.)

-Spam

-Anything pickled

-TWINKIES, VERY IMPORTANT (For desert, to keep your blood sugar up, and because they never, ever, go bad).

Do NOT stock up on:

                -Frozen meat (because it won’t stay frozen long once the power's knocked out and that merely   attracts unsavory guests)

-Baked goods (baked goods are for the good times, people stuck in the good times don’t survive The Apocalypse ergo, no baked goods)

                -Fresh fruit and veggies(that’s just a sticky mess)

                -Things you have to stay in one place to cook and eat, for obvious reasons. 

*Got the idea for that one from here